Synyster Graves

Microsoft Proofing Tools

by on Jan.09, 2014, under IT Support

There is something completely illogical about Microsoft’s proofing tools in my opinion. So you set up your server to have all the correct regional settings; in my case United Kingdom. Your format is the UK, your location is the UK, even your sodding Time & Date is set for the Greenwich Meridian so you don’t end up being seven hours out of kilter. Your regional settings look something like this:
proofing1proofing2

So I ask you, why in the name of fuck¬†does the proofing tools globally decide to default to US English? This wouldn’t be such a problem if the fucking Americans could actually spell properly! I mean logically, since it’s all Microsoft suite and is all integrated how hard is it to be a bit intuitive? The last thing I expect to see is bullshit and borderline dyslexic American bullcrap underlining words like “authorise” and “colour” with stupid red squiggles underneath. It’s bad enough that the most popular word processing tool in the world has to prioritise the syntactic failings of a country with a 500 year history who are so hell bent of doing it their own way, they have the spelling capabilities of toddler, but have to inflict their shit way of spelling on all my emails? It’s fucking annoying.

Why the hell is US English even there as an option, all my settings clearing stipulate that I'm in the UK!

Why the hell is US English even there as an option, all my settings clearing stipulate that I’m in the UK!

Detect language automatically is on by default, well how the hell did it detect English (United States) then? I don’t use stupid suffixes ending in “-ize”. Just turn that shite off.

It’s simple enough to ignore and gloss over the fact that they have to polysyllabically appropriate in a stupid word like “faucet” when the word “tap” will accurately suffice, but what pisses me off the most is why the fuck do they have to shove “z” into a suffix. We’re not in Poland. I know the later Microsoft office packages have the Proofing tools off the Start Menu but I’d expect that since it reads from the server’s registry, it would at least have the common fucking courtesy to use the system’s locale as the default language.! I mean Americans can’t even semantically get football correct. “Hand-egg” would be more semantically appropriate yet they have to try and make us call it “soccer”, despite the game being around longer than their fucking country.

You shouldn’t have to trawl around your system looking to assassinate the US English option, all the evidence points at the UK and that should be the blanket default of your system.

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