Do I want to be an inebriated cunt in a foreign country? No thanks!

A few many years ago a whole bunch of my close mates booked a lads holiday in Ibiza. As you would expect it was a whole load of them en mass descending upon a archetypal “lads” holiday abroad. You see enough programs of dickhead twats from England acting like uncaged animals when they’re abroad. These most odious of persons I have no intention of associating with or being one of purely based on the notion that I understand my own limits. Sure it’s ok to go let your hair down, but to get to the stage that you think you can behave without consequence just because you’re away from home, for me, is not a valid excuse. On the flip side it’s a holiday with your friends, and at the time we were all living with our respective parents so a welcome break after a tough run of employment and University final exams could have been just what the doctor ordered. But hand on heart I wouldn’t have been 100% for a lads holiday, something more quiet is my cup of tea. But it was with, well what I counted at the time, as three of my best friends, one of which I used to hang out with every night after work.

But going back to my point, yes I agree it was not the sort of thing I would choose to go on, but to not get asked at all is an entirely different thing altogether. I always invite people to even if I know they are not into it, for example and have a few friends who hate football, when England were on in the Euros I still invite them even though I know they would not want to come. That’s just manners. What’s even worse is that they asked me to take them to the airport. Now that’s just fucking rude if you ask me. Leaving me out is one thing, but that just added insult to injury. Being a naive mug I did indeed take them and pick them up from the airport and in hindsight I wish I just went and told them to go fuck themselves. In all honesty I probably would have said no I wouldn’t want to go and it’s a fair assumption, but to not get invited and then asked to transport them there, it was a bit rich for me.

Maybe I’m more cynical in my maturity now in the fact that people who you consider to be your best friends completely forget you it seems like a kick in the balls but it happens. It’s nice to be invited, even if you don’t want to go, but that’s what real friends do I suppose. It’s even worse when they try and lie about it, this then becomes a totally different ball game. It comes down to a question of integrity at the end of the day that if they can’t be straight with you, then they’re really not your friends at all.

So in summary, even if you know your friend is not interested in doing something, inviting them is still a decent thing to do. Leaving them out and hoping they don’t find out is a shitty thing to do on the converse, and frankly makes you a particularly shit friend. And expecting them to take you there and not expect them to come along is an even shittier thing to do. Segregation is not cool, especially when they pretend that at the time they didn’t think of you. Once is a coincidence, three times is a conspiracy. It gets even worse when you find out and they feign that they called you but couldn’t get hold of you. Either be honest, or fuck off. If you don’t like someone, just tell them. Don’t pretend to be their friend, it’s out of order and it’s not on.

Take a look at yourself and put your hand on your conscience and work out if you’ve been a decent friend. I still invite my football hating mates to watch England play, but then again I have my integrity and I’m not a fake. Some people cannot say that.