Synyster Graves

Suddenly, I’m not half the man I used to be…

by on Nov.17, 2011, under Domestic Football

Ha ha ha, Failnando Torres still cracks me up. Not only has it almost been an entire year since he walked out on Liverpool to get himself a bigger wallet, not only has he actually scored less goals at Stamford Bridge than Robin van Persie, but every two or three weeks is an article surfacing on Sky Sports saying how someone or another says that Torres will reach top form soon, whether it’s Andrei Shevchenko, Jose Mourinho, half the Spanish squad, Mystic Meg, Clarke Kent, Caractacus P. Doom or the Archbishop of Canterbury.

Today’s amusing attempt to convince everyone that Torres was worth the £50million comes from Torres himself who claims:

“If you do that and things do not work out, you have nothing to be ashamed of.”

 ”But I am in debt to the Chelsea fans. They have always supported me.

“And I promise them the one thing I have never done and will never do in my life is give up.”

So when you’re talking about the Chelsea fans who support you, do you mean these chaps:

And what about this rum chap?:

But of course, Torres move was for “footballing” reasons nearly 12 months ago. See ya!

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